Saturday, August 30, 2008

7 Perkara

7 Fakta Mengenai Diri Saya (7 Facts about Me..)

  1. I'm overweight and i don't like people to make fun of that.
  2. I'm quite talkative really.
  3. I'm quite sensitive.
  4. My life is my pc.
  5. Think alot, 360 degrees thought yet there are always loophole here and there.
  6. I love kids.
  7. Easily irritated even by smallest miss out but i keep things to myself.

7 Perkara Yang Menakutkan Saya Di Dunia (7 Things that Scare Me in the World.. -_-)

  1. Live without PC.
  2. Live without internet.
  3. No friends.
  4. No family.
  5. No space for myself.
  6. Not being myself.
  7. Venomous creature.

7 Lagu Kegemaran Buat Masa Sekarang (7 Current Favourite Songs)

  1. YUI - Oh My God.
  2. YUI - Laugh Away.
  3. Otsuka Ai - Sakuranbo.
  4. The Cure - Boys Don't Cry (my ringtone).
  5. Jason Mraz - I'm Yours.
  6. Otsuka Ai - Rocket Sneakers.
  7. Matchbox 20 - Mad Season.

7 Perkataan Yang Selalu Saya Sebut (7 Words Mostly I Said..)

  1. Okies.
  2. Yeah, right.
  3. God Damn It.
  4. Arghhh..fuck!
  5. Yo.
  6. ahhh...cute!
  7. hehehehe.

7 Perkara Yang Bernilai Bagi Diri Saya (7 Valuable Things for Me)

  1. Me myself.
  2. My PC.
  3. My internet.
  4. My japanese drama.
  5. My friends.
  6. My family.
  7. My work.

7 Pertama Kali Dalam Hidup Saya (7 First Time in My Life)

  1. First time buying my own PC.
  2. First time Jdorama; GTO.
  3. First time working.
  4. First time living in KL.
  5. First time away from home.
  6. First time falling in love.
  7. And so many other first time that I do not dare to reveal here.

7 Orang Yang Bertuah Untuk Menjawab Soalan-soalan Di Atas (7 “Lucky” Peeps That Need to Waste Their Time Doing This)

Sesape je la. Kalau rajin dan banyak masa kosong, silakan buat. :)

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Consumerism Whore


We're consumerism whore. Consumerism is a need, nonetheless you're a plain, household consumer or high profile business consumer. You consume, purchase, buy, trade, procure or whatever fucking term for consumerism.

I found it's amusing how much consumerism; the way we spent our money reflect our social status. Simplest example I see in front of my eyes that a friend of mine buys SEED shirt which cost him RM 200. It's an arguable cost for me; much to give me idea to ridicule his concept of consumerism. RM 200 for fucking shirt that nobody really care anyway. Some might take a look at those fancy shirt but I'm not one of them and even the material wasn't the best anyway if quality comes into question. One of my officemate even buy Burberry necktie which cost him RM 300.

People looking at consumer brand to "brand" themselves, to set their level. I have no problem with that if you think the brand could provide some social status or make women chasing after you but what concern me on how consumerism "consumed" your lifestyle.

As most people love to coin the term of "executive lifestyle", it's a term of vomit-induced for me. WHAT THE FUCK WITH EXECUTIVE LIFESTYLE? For those who ain't familiar to executive lifestyle term, it's a term referring to 5Cs; condo, car, credit card, cash and career. It's a benchmark to gauge where a person belongs, how much his worthy. I used to have a talk with one manager on this 5Cs which going like this:

Manager: So, you duduk kat mana?
Me: Gombak. Dekat area taman melati.
Manager: Owh, berapa orang duduk serumah? Sewa macam mana?
Me: Kami duduk 5 orang (now 4), sewa around RM 550 untuk rumah sahaja. Kalau campur utilities bill around RM 900 per month la.
Manager: Murah nya. Kenapa you tak duduk kondo, dah la bersesak-sesak sangat rumah you tu. You as an executive should living in comfort, at least sewa la kondo around your area there.
Me: Owh..i don't think i need it.

Soon, i skewed the conversation to somewhere else as i clearly could see where the conversation going to lead should i let it. You see, i found that it's non-practical approach to have a house that cost me RM 1000 per month on rental alone while i hardly spent any time at home during weekdays except to get some sleep, shower and toilet. Most of my time during weekdays spent outside the house and i'm totally ok with small and cramp space of my room.

Many would argue that i buy expensive perfume, IKEA furniture and Liverpool jersey but here's the catch for those.

I need perfume that long last but i also wear RM 10 perfume from Generic Perfume. As long as i love the smell, i would buy it. RM 10 perfume could also smell nice and last longer. I buy perfume because you see, i sweat alot and i hate when i smell like salted fish. Deodorant alone won't do.

I buy IKEA furniture because they could provide the best wooden furniture that compact, space efficient and i could assemble it on my own. I hate metal bed because it will make sound when the hinges, bolts and nuts loose. It could drive me crazy.

I buy Liverpool jersey because i'm a fan of LFC and it's a healthy hobby. I found myself into football which much better than rempitting and other immoral behaviour.

I strongly believe in practicality. there are things that i need and things that i want so i just put my priority on my needs greater than my wants. I don't spent money like hell if i know i need to makan megi before middle of the month.

I wasn't say that i not part of consumerism whore. I myself love to buy gadget and upgrading my pc which sometimes quite disastrous. But slowly i want to get back to my rational side and thinking back everytime i want to spend my money. I found it's hard to get there.

So, let be wiser in spending our money and let's not eat megi before the end of the month!

Friday, August 15, 2008

Dope

this piece was lost

i will keep filling

this empty hole with emptiness

shallow feeling of loneliness


afraid not to dream

but i'm tired of nightmare

which i couldn't shake off


i'm my intoxication

that keep me high

in this narrow tunnel

the light won't shine again


let me be here

don't you bother

cause i will never

be your matter


this piece will always lost

i forge the smile

i fake the tears

i clone the heart

would you please be happy now?


04 August 2008 - 20.31

Originally posted here.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

I was...

a light hearted, cheeky and a bit "non-filtered' mouth persona.

Now, i'm a bitter, still cheeky, pessimist, foul mouth, introvert asshole. Life robbed me!

So I said la.

I hate it when people keep asking those fucking typical question:

"Kenapa ko takder awek? Ko gay ke?"

That's and big L stamp on my head.

Why is it such a bother to some people that I don't lingering around with girl?

Why is it such a bother that I prefer to stay at home watching japanese drama than dating?

Why is it such a bother that I refuse to pick up call/sms during weekend?

Why is it such a bother that I hanging out with my male friends?

Why is it such a bother that I going back home from work alone?

Go fuck yourself for fuck sake!

I'm an introvert character, I spent my time at home during weekend more than a mother of 3, I love Japanese drama, I hate dating, I hate going out during weekend, and I love my home.

I found it so difficult for some people especially women to accept that i socialize more with my computer than i socialize with people. I choose people i hanging out with even so, i just could find any reason to turn any invitation from those familiar people. I don't have explanation for that and i don't have to explain it to you.

i hate it when i need to explain myself. Can people just trust me without asking much? Just assume i have my own reason or you could shove your mind that i'm an introvert asshole if that's make you happy.

I wish i could find women like my older sister which trust me without asking much, which could advice me without yelling/shouting, which could get mad at me but hardly saying anything which make me crying of guilt, which love me for bits of good and bad, which i never call her yet still warm up to me everytime i call her asking for help, which i never think twice to do her a favor. for such fine woman, i would sell my soul to get her.

Just stop asking so much question and just trust me. is that so difficult?

Go fuck yourself and stop asking me such question! FUCK!

p/s: i'm furious. i'm tired. i'm a bother.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Why I Should Never Keep Log?


.......cause I will read it over and over again, ended up with lots of regret. I mean CHAT log.

Yesterday, I was bored to tears when I open an MiRC chat log; a personal message between Mr Y and Miss X. Someone sent it to me. The log was a piece of valuable evidence. The log torn my belief system over people. If I had bad heart, I would died immediately due to heart failure. It's hurtful and deceitful.

*sigh* I hate myself when I let myself down and yesterday was a very bad day where I again sent myself to "hell".

For brief moment, I wish I was dead. Yet, I'm alive and the pain grew all over me. My mood officially spoil. *sigh*

I wish I could share it with someone but details are evil; it will change people's perspective. Just let me bury myself in this feeling. Let me indulge the pain, let me drown. *sigh*

Monday, August 11, 2008

The Archer

So I watched opening ceremony of Beijing 2008. Wasn't impressed me much except they make use of light at best! I still think Athens 2004 had one hell of opening ceremony compared to what Beijing had done. Nevertheless, I been set my eyes to Korean archers since Sydney 2000 and now i finally moved to next stage in knowing them. Known well in providing best archer in the sport, Korean archers had been excel in Olympic since the first introduction to the sport in Olympic. I keen to get know their female archer which so cute yet very intimidating in their performance. My favorite archer in my opinion is:

Yun Ok Hee - Korea

Look at her panda's chest protector and pink bow, you never thought that she's one of the best archer in the world. She so cute yet she's so intimidating when she doing her business! (ok2, she's just my taste). I had been seeing her since Sydney but couldn't get her name that time. I miss most of Athens 2004 so hardly see her.

Ok, that's my rumbling for today. Will update more if i have the time and the mood~!

Thursday, August 07, 2008

Vaca-Time

So i went to Tioman with [spam]ers united! and went to Lata Kinjang & Cameron with fellow office mate. It's within 3 weeks and i'm gone for various adventure. July and August was/is gonna be interesting!

Lata Kinjang & Cameron Trip (02 August - 03 August)

9 of us (including photographer)

Air terjun yang sejuks banget!

BBQ ayam, sotong dan errr...orang. :P

Cameron Valley - Bharat Tea

Parkland Hotel

BOH Tea Plantation

BOH Tea Centre, Sungei Palas

Obligatory group photo!
Was one hell of a journey. Hehehe.

Tioman trip with [spam]ers united! (18 July - 20 July)

Jeti Tekek: Where it's all start

Truck which make my ass flat!

Kg Juara; chalet and "nest" for next 2 days

The night shot with jetty background

Snokerling trip

Indecent exposure!

Welcome to the dark side!

Night activities

Baptism of fire!

Going back the next day

Bye bye Tioman!

Now, that's the reason why I'm away for 3 weeks. Planning, packing, unpacking, walking, running, camwhoring, bla bla bla takes up alot of energy. Till next post.

Tioman Trip: RM 250 per person (10 pax)
Cameron Trip: RM 120 per person (9 pax)