Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Dear diary I

dear diary,

today is not my most beautiful day. i'm pretty much exhaustive at work, my mind couldn't work faster than it should and tons and tons of work on my plate. i keep telling myself, "this will end, someday". i wasn't please to see myself this bimbo; feel like chasing after a bullet train on a bicycle. i dunno what's wrong with my mind but it seems lately my mind being too stupid to absorb things that i need to learn quickly. am i getting older, diary?

after work, i have my own personal hell waiting. i hate to think things after work. mom give me hell throughout this month. i dunno why but it seems nothing i could do to satisfy her. i'm indifferent right now. am i a bad son, diary?

and when everything couldn't get right, i so not in the mood. so, i lost my appetite. lost lots of my sleep and everyday seems become more difficult to walk on. i spoil her mood again. it's my fault. i couldn't cheer up to her given my current condition. am i selfish, diary?

right now, i feel nothing. numb. heavily sedated. barely move. diary, i feel like crying. i hate myself when i cry but what could i do, diary? i'm really tired, diary. will you hug me and comfort me for a while? thank you, diary.

now,allow me to leap off the building. goodbye. thank you for listening. i love you so much.

8 comments:

- H - said...

are you ok?

Anonymous said...

don't worry, i'll still love u.
mwahks! =P
& huggs! thehe..

and don't think about everything. x muat space la nnt, kan?
take care! ;)

Anonymous said...

oh..tetinggal..

lurve u lotsss! ;p

dueng said...

naxerul: am ok. :)

mrs mangifera: hello dear. love you too. mwaks! sayang kamu sangat sangat sangat sangat. :P

owh..and thanks for being so understading. :)

Anonymous said...

*raised eyebrow*

hmmm.... interesting....

dueng said...

adek: hehehehe. opss. kantoi dgn adek. :P

Anonymous said...

o my..so sweet... bahagia slalu la hndaknya ya..

dueng said...

dear miss,

hopefully it's goes well. :)